Do I Really Feel Like That?

by Phyllis Sather on March 13, 2013

yet-i-still-belong-to-you“It is often in the unguarded moments that our talk reveals our inner life.” Mille Stamm

This is one of the many reasons I journal. I’ve gotten used to pouring my heart out to the Lord, sometimes complaining and sometimes rejoicing.

Regardless of which mode I’m in the Lord listens patiently to my despair or enjoys (I hope) my rejoicing. Today I want to address those journal entries that contain my complaining. What good can writing down your complaints do? Well, for starters it’s a good way to get something “off your chest” without hurting anyone. There have been times that I’ve hurriedly written down my angry, frustrated thoughts and feelings. After that I usually feel calm enough to read what I’ve written. That is usually quite eye opening for me.

I discovered when I began homeschooling that I am a very visual learner. (Isn’t it amazing how much we homeschool mothers learn while we’re teaching?) So having a chance to see in writing what I’m thinking and feeling usually surprises me. Our children have been quite surprised by how written things can sound very differently from thoughts – but that’s another post.

I find myself thinking that’s quite a strong word. Do I really feel that strongly about this? Hate…did I really say that? I guess I don’t hate it as much as I dislike it or perhaps I’m just uncomfortable with it. Why am I uncomfortable with that?

You get the picture. As this Scripture from Matthew says, “O generation of vipers, how can ye, being evil, speak good things? for out of the abundance of the heart the mouth speaketh.” Matthew 12:34 KJV
I’ve learned that there is an advantage to taking my thoughts and feelings to the Lord in writing. It really helps me get them out in a way that doesn’t harm others, yet allows me to work through them instead of just stuffing them so my mouth speaks them out at the wrong time or place.

I guess it helps me distill them down to what I really need to deal with – my sin or sometimes the sin of someone against me.

It brings me to the place where I can seek forgiveness or forgive, neither is a bad place to be. I usually commit the whole thing to the Lord – thoughts, feelings, situation – and trust Him to use it for good in my life.
How’s that for a happy ending?

2 Timothy 1:12 KJV – For the which cause I also suffer these things: nevertheless I am not ashamed: for I know whom I have believed, and am persuaded that he is able to keep that which I have committed unto him against that day.

Finding Joy in the Journey,

Phyllis

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